Here are five impeccable practices to keep in mind as you navigate endings or transitions in business relationships.
- Honor people and protect relationships. Make honoring people your anthem, your banner, the story of your life—not because it’s ideal for getting best results as a leader. Rather, honor people because it is a value you choose to live by. Honor people, and let the chips fall where they may. Honor people when you feel bad. Honor people whether they excel or fail. Honor people at the beginning and at the end. Just honor people. When you are intentional to honor people, you position yourself to protect relationships.
- Make their best interests your ultimate goal. Naturally, we want to protect our organization and do what is best for our leadership. I challenge you to do what is best for your people, even above the needs of your organization. If what is best for your people is not what is best for your organization or team as a whole, that’s when change takes place, or sometimes an ending. If what is best for someone who works with you is for them to leave, cheer them on and help them do it. If their overarching dream is not aligned with yours, or with the dream of your organization, do not push them to stay. Encourage them to pursue what is best for them. The goal I set for myself is to make my team and my organization the best place for people to work as much as I am able. So when I ask, “What is best for my people?” I want the answer to be, “Here with us.”
- Don’t talk them out of it. This is a common mistake. I made this mistake in the past, but I finally learned this lesson. When someone tells you they want to leave, it’s too late to talk them out of it, and if you do, their stay will probably be short-lived. For instance, if you give them a raise to sway them to stay on, it is not ideal for either side and typically only serves to prolong the ending. When someone makes a decision and communicates they want to leave, the Rubicon has been crossed, which means they have mentally and emotionally passed the point of return. Having said this, in light of seasons, there may be a future change in scope or direction that opens a door to new collaboration down the road.
- Do your best to let them leave happy. All too often endings result in a divisive rift and personal injury. People leave unhappy. In my experience, when this happens, the hurt continues long after the ending. I’ve had people intentionally spread rumors beyond our organizational circles and cause problems, even after they were far outside our walls. As we aim to honor people because it’s the right thing to do, let’s make it our goal for them to leave as happy as possible to preserve relationships and prevent post-separation hurt.
- Be open to future collaboration. I have found in my leadership journey that when relationships ended and honor was held on both sides, years later a change in season often presents a new opportunity for collaboration. Naturally, there is a tendency to feel hurt when someone leaves. It’s easy to say to yourself, I can’t believe they are doing this. I will never work with them again. Don’t allow your mind to go there. Honor what people are feeling and sensing and just know that sometimes ending is best. Sometimes coming back together in the future is not only possible, but it becomes a great idea. This is not possible if you approach the ending with absolute finality.
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