I?m Asking Your Opinion, Not Giving You My Authority
We must be clear that when we ask for?advice, we are not giving away?our authority. When we seek consensus, we are not forfeiting our right to the final word. The best way to?lead is with?gentleness, and that’s what I practice. However, that only works when?everyone is clear who has the final authority. I learned the […]
What We Can Learn from Donald Trump
As I have followed the latest US presidential campaign, I have given some thought to the phenomenon of Donald Trump. Almost?no one predicted he would still maintain the lead with the other GOP candidates. Many dismiss him as bombastic, ruthless, crude, and offensive. Some call him?an intellectual lightweight. But as a student of leadership, I […]
Freedom Is Not Free
Tomorrow, the United States will celebrate her?independence. We call it?the 4th of July, or Independence Day because it was on July 4, 1776 that the Declaration of Independence?was adopted. So many have risked their lives to establish and defend our?freedom. This blog speaks to?their honor.?Specifically, I want to share with you what I observed during […]
Don’t Diminish Friendships | Establish Boundaries
?I feel like I am becoming more of a friend, and less of a boss.? Many leaders grapple to?define relationships with their people. Most of us would like?a comfortable, personal element in our?relationships with our staff, but fear losing our authority and their respect. If we are going to progress successfully in leadership, we must […]
Don’t Invade. Invite.
Great leaders do not invade. They invite. They do not invade people?s boundaries to pull?them along on the journey. They invite them to join them instead. When we are willing to show others the respect they deserve, it completely alters our approach. Invasion tears people down. You only have to watch three and?four year-olds play […]
When Feelings Get Hurt
I recently offended someone on my team. And that made me feel bad. I was wrong. What was more humbling was that I had no idea that I had offended that person. In this article, I want to share with you how hurt feelings should be handled on a team?by both the offender and the […]
They See You: How To Be a Good Audience Member
When I started speaking in front of audiences, I discovered a startling truth: speakers can actually see the attendees. They see their faces, expressions, and body language. Up to that point, I thought I was invisible when I sat in the audience. I never thought about how to be a good audience member, really. Why […]
When Your People Don?t Respect You ? Part III
Almost all people respond to gentle, respectful, clear, and candid communication – communication that values them and respects their journey. ? In Part I and Part II of this series, we talked about the right approach to take in order to gain someone’s respect. ?We talked about avoiding the temptation to be forceful. ?Today, I’d […]
When Your People Don’t Respect You – Part II
What do you do when your people don?t respect you?? Being “assertive” may temporarily cause people to leap into action. ?But it will not foster trust or respect for yourself as a leader. ?After all, would you respect this guy… Never give an order that you don?t know will be obeyed.? Of course, I don?t […]
When Your People Don’t Respect You – Part I
Recently I was coaching a young leader who had just taken on a new leadership position.? I asked her what current challenge she would like to overcome in her new leadership role. ?She thought about it for a few seconds and said, ?I need to be more assertive.? As we talked more, I recognized this […]