Are you in charge of your thoughts, or are they always automatic, reflexive and spontaneous? I discovered if I want to control my thoughts, feelings, actions, and life, I cannot let my brain freely dictate what I think about.
Do you ever find yourself obsessing about a thought, an idea, or a problem? Do you wish you could stop thinking about it? You can! And you should acquire that skill.
Let me share with you how this principle was one of the biggest breakthroughs I have ever had after years of personal defeat in this area.
One of the major challenges of my life was worry. Perfectionist by nature, I would obsess, fixate and become consumed with a problem I had, or a project I was in charge of, or a schedule I was trying to plan. I couldn’t sleep well because I was thinking about it. I couldn’t listen well, because I was thinking about it. I became a prisoner of that thought, at least until my brain decided that it had a satisfactory resolution.
Then, breakthrough! I discovered that worry can disappear completely if I control my thoughts on the issues I am worried about. But then I thought, How can I stop my thoughts? And, should I stop my thoughts? After all, I always come up with solutions when I am thinking about the problem.
After searching and praying the answer came to me.
- Worry is solving problems at the wrong time. It is okay not to solve problems all the time. Give yourself permission to have time free from problem-solving. Decide when that is.
- Find out what thoughts are producing the worry.
- Aim to recognize them as soon as they happen.
- Decide what other thoughts you want to think about instead. If you have this pre-planned, it will be easier to stop one thought and insert another in its place, than trying to stop one thought and then just think of nothing.
- Start practicing the skill of controlling what you think about. This is very hard, but it can be done. Here is the exercise that helped me attain this skill: Count to 50 or 100 without allowing of any other thought to come to your mind, other than visualizing the numbers. This takes a few weeks of dedicated practice. Try it now! When you can do it, you will have conquered the hardest step in controlling your thoughts.
Then start living in more freedom!
- Spot the thought to stop.
- Stop the thought you spot.
- Replace that thought.
Do you see the possibilities here?
No thoughts of discouragement; you get more courage. No thoughts of despair; you get more hope. No thoughts of hate; you get more love. No scornful thoughts of others; you become less critical.
Do not let your thoughts roam free—at least not all the time. Think about what you think about. Think before you think!
